The Snorkness Monster/Transcript
(The snorks are on a bus taking a field trip)
Ms. Seabottom: Well here we are, class - in that remote area of Snorkland known as Snorkness.
(Angus McSquid is playing the bagpipe while the kids - and Occy - swim off the bus)
Ms. Seabottom: Now remember, children. Don't wander too far from the bus.
(Allstar and his friends watch Angus McSquid playing)
Junior: What is that guy doing to that octopus?
Casey: It's not an octopus, Junior.
Allstar: It's a musical instrument called a bagpipe.
(Tooter imitates its sounds)
Angus: Good laddy. That be a can bit a tone you be dwelling.
Junior: I can't understand a word he said. What'd he say?
Tooter: *translates it for him*
Junior: Oh. Why am I asking him?
Dimmy: Ms. Seabottom, Daffney and I would like to go shell hunting.
Daffney: We've already found some great ones.
Casey: And I'd to go off and collect seaweed sample.
Ms. Seabottom: Alright. But be careful, and don't go into any of the caves at the foot of the highlands.
Daffney: Why? What's in them?
Angus: Ya didn't wanna know, my wee ones, some say that in those caves where you'll be finding the likes of - the Snorkness Monster.
All: The Snorkness Monster?!
Angus: Ay, a shore as my name is Angus McSquid, it's sure that the monster like the wee youngin's.
(Occy finds bagpipe and growls at it)
Junior: Well if this monster likes kids, what's the problem?
Angus: Well no one's quite sure how the monster like 'em, except for breakfast, lunch, or dinner.
Junior: Ah, that's hogwash! There's no such thing as the snorkness monster!
(Occy and bagpipe get stuck)
Allstar: What's that?
Junior: It's the monster! Run for your lives!
Casey: Not it's not! It's Occy being chased by that bagpipe! Junior, you're scared.
Junior: Scared? Who's scared? Like I said, I don't believe in monsters.
Angus: I'd be careful around those caves if I were you - very careful.
(Casey tries to find it near caves)
Casey: Dangerous or not, these caves sure are pretty. I wonder what's inside. Hello? *echo* Snorkness monster, are you in there? *echos* Who am I kidding? junior's right. There's no such thing as a monster.
(But the Snorkness Mosnter sees her)
Casey: Uh, hello there. *feeds seaweed to her* You, look like you're, you're hungry. *eats it and it licks her* Well, I gotta go now. My friends are waiting. See you.
(swims away, back to the other as Occy still carries bagpipe with him)
Casey: Wait'll I tell everybody about this.
(she gets them to come with her)
Junior: I think this is preposterous.
Casey: The Snorkness Monster was right here. Yoo hoo, monster! *echo*
Junior: That's no monster, it's just your echo!
Allstar: *noise* That wasn't anybody's echo!
Junior: *runs* Save me, I'm too young to be anybody's lunch!
Allstar: Wait a minute, I recognize those bagpipes anywhere, it's Occy.
Junior: What?! Not again!
Casey: What was he doing in there?
Junior: I'll tell you what - you put him up to this to trick me, that's what. i wasn't scared for a minute. i know a seaweed when I see it.
(all see pearl)
Casey: It looks like..
Daffney: But it can't be...
Dimmy: Oh yeah, we found a pearl!
Junior: Correction, Dimwit, I found a pearl, and and this is my souvenir from the land of Snorkness. Wait'll the newspapers get a look at this. I'll be famous!
(Snorkness cries)
(Back in Snorkland, Governor Wetworth gives a speech)
Governor Wetworth: And it is with great pressue - ooh, that is pleasure, that I urge you all to applaud the efforts of my son. For it was his genius, his perception, his keen instincts, --
Allstar: His fright.
Casey: *giggles*
Governor Wetworth: That made the discovery of this wonderful treasure possible. Ladies and jellyfish, I mean getntlesnorks, I give you, I-I show you, the Wetworth peal! A treasure that all of Snorkland will value forever.
Angus: But it be a treasure that was stolen.
Governor Wetworth: What? Who said that?
Angus: Twas me, Angus McSquid. That treasure belongs to the Snorkness Mosnter. I;ve come to take it back to Snorkness.
Junior: Finders keepers, losers weepers!
Angus: I'm warning yee! If tt isn't returned, the consequences will be very serious!
Governor Wetworth: I can't understand a word you're saying. What did he say?
Allstar: Gosh, Angus, what are you doing here?
Angus: It's the monster! It's wailing and moaning over the loss of its treasure! With all the noise, we cannot sleep no more in Snorkness!
Casey: See, I told you there was a mosnter.
Daffney: It sure sounds like tehre's something going on up there.
Tooter: *explains*
Allstar: Right, Tooter, we'll take the Silverfish.
<TRANSITION>
(The snorks are on Silverfish)
Casey: It sure was nice of Gallio to lean us his babbletron machine.
Dimmy: What's this thing supposed to do?
Casey: Well, Gallio originally built it to communicate with sea creatures.
Allstar: And I've added a few improvements.
Dimmy: You mean this thing really lets you talk to animals?
Casey: Yes, and it lets them talk back to you.
Dimmy: Allstar, the caves are dead ahead.
Daffney: What was that?
Casey: It sounded to me like the monster.
Allstar: We're going in for a closer look.
(Snorkness blows it away)
Casey: Look, it's the Snorkness Mosnter!
Daffney: That mosnter looks pretty mad.
Allstar: Let's get out of here.
Dimmy: Uh oh, it's tracing us.
Allstar: I'll turn around. We'll face that monster.
Casey: What?
Allstar: Standing by with the babbletron machine!
Casey: Standing by!
Allstar: Okay, Casey, turn it on now!
Casey: *but the machine bounces around* It's not working.
Allstar: Oh great, and here comes our friend.
Daffney: Can you fix it?
Allstar: I don't know.
Dimmy: Hurry, Allstar. That ugly monster's gaining on us.
Daffney: Oh dear, what are we gonna do?
Casey: Well, if anybody can do anything about it, it's me.
Allstar: Casey, no!
(Casey heads over to feed it again)
Casey: Stop! *feeds it seaweed* Remember me?
Allstar: I don't beleive it. Casey's got that mosnter eating out of her hand.
Daffney: Aww.
Dimmy: What's wrong with this dumb machine? *kicks it* Hey, I fixed it!
Allstar: How'd you learn that?
Dimmy: *smiles* You're not the only mechanical genius, you know.
Allstar: Uh, hello, fella, we come in peace.
Nessie: I'm not a fella. My name is Nessie.
Casey: Why nessie, you're a girl, like me.
Allstar: Why were you making so much noise back there? Was it because we took your pearl?
Nessie: Silly snorks, that was no pearl, that was my egg.
Casey: An egg?! Oh no!
Nessie: *cries* And I'm so very sad. it was going to hatch any day now.
Casey: Nessie, as one girl to another, I promise that we'll return your egg to you no matter what.
(Now at the Wetworth home)
Casey: It doesn't seem to be anybody home.
Daffney: Now what'll we do?
Casey: We've gota get that egg back to Nessie before it hatches
Allstar: Maybe we can find an open window. Come on.
Dimmy: Hey Allstar, what we're doing isn't stealing, is it?
Allstar: Of course not. We're just returning something that Junior already stole.
(Tooter leaves)
Casey: Oh no! Every window is shut tight.
Allstar: Well, that's that. We can't just break in.
(Tooter pops out)
All: Tooter!
Dimmy: How'd you get inside?
Tooter: *explains it to them*
Allstar: Oh, the front door was open!
Tooter: *toots yes*
Casey: We've got to hurry. There isn't much time left before it hatches. *sees it* There it is.
Daffney: Let's take it and get out of here.
Junior: Ah ha! Caught ya snork handed?
Governor Wetworth: What's going on here?
Allstar: We can explain, sir.
Junior: There's nothing to explain here. It's obvious that you all wanted to steal my pearl.
Casey: But Junior, this isn't a pearl, and we have to return it to its rightful owner.
Junior: I'm its rightful owner! This pearl is mine! Mine, mine, mine!
(egg hatches)
Baby Nessie: *says mama and gets on Junior*
Junior: Quiet, kid, can't you see I'm talking? Yipe! *runs off*
Baby Nessie: *still says mama*
Junior: Help, a monster! Allstar, Casey, do something!
Baby Nessie: *still says mama*
Casey: Don't worry, we'll do the right thing. We'll return him to its real mother.
Allstar: Or would you rather raise him here?
Governor Wetworth: Oh, take him away! I've had enough trouble raising one monster!
(Casey returns the baby to Nessie)
Baby Nessie: *says mama to Nessie and they rub each other*
Casey: *Nessie licks her* Hey, cut it out.
Allstar: What a nice family picture.
Tooter: *agrees*
Daffney: *sees Angus crying* Why Angus, you're crying. You're supposed to be happy.
Angus: Ack, no. Now we do not have a proper monster mystery in Snorkness anymore. I'll miss it.
(Occy and bagpipes again)
Allstar: Maybe we can loan him Occy. *Occy licks him* You can become famous as the -- Occyness monster!
(c) 1984 Hanna-Barbera and SEPP International